High school was the highlight of my life, so many different and important things happened during that time, most importantly it's the period I finally came out.
It was the year after my mother had passed away and I had decided to go to a High School that had my cousins in it, I didn't really have any attachment to anyone after Primary School besides one of my real best friends who ended up going to an all-girls school and we lost touch. By this time my friendship with my german friend had come to a complete standstill, he had ended up moving away and the only other friends I had was the family that had introduced me to Lion King (lol), they were a family of two girls with two loving parents, they were always there from the very beginning and for a long time they were my escape from my reality, they gave me exactly what I needed - love.
Through my first year at school I felt displaced and different from the crowd, at that time I didn't know if it was depression or if it was me not even trying to fit in with the crowd, crying came too easily to me and I was weak. I tried to make friends and for a short while I made some, however it was difficult because I was still carrying this grudge within me and it was blocking me from reality, everything got to me and I was always sensitive to what people said. If anyone ever needed to look for me they would surely find me sitting at the library burying my head in a book or on the internet, I wasn't too fond of seeing what happened beyond my school walls too much, I was more content with the silence however I was always curious about my surroundings and how the people around me thought.
In my second year I had become a bit more consistent with the group of people I called friends and things for a change seemed to be going really well, the rumor about my "so-called" sexuality had arisen again and I could no longer hide from it, this very same group of friends also made me feel secure enough in myself to confide my secret to my "Lion King" family first and foremost, I told myself I'd judge by their reaction and see how many more people I could tell, soon enough I became a bit more comfortable to actually act upon my newfound power and sanity, I admit it balanced me a bit to get that chip right off my shoulder however I still hadn't told one very important person - Boss Lady.
For a long time I had a crush on a popular boy at my school (who shall forever remain nameless for privacy reasons) and I had kept it to myself, I used to have a little school-girl crush on him and one day one of my friends organized his number for me so I decided to give him a call and confess my undying love for him, now that I look back on that day I laugh harder than I ever have before but in the moment I was blinded by being a recently out-of-closet teen, the response of course from his side was that he wasn't interested and he had every reason to not be...The boy was straight! And with that one phone call the entire high school found out and I never truly lived that phone call down, it made things awkward for me and I decided at one point before the year was done that it was either I continued to be weak or to face the challenge with a smile and MINCE! and oh baby did I mince!
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